April 3rd, 2010
A free-association piece inspired after reading this article about “Freeconomics” on the Wired Blog. Simply awesome article in my opinion – if your a young entrepreneurial type person, or have an interest in the turning tides of technology and their implications for the web and beyond – have at it!! Even if you don’t I’d still recommend giving it a read 
. I really should get paid for this….. well… that’s another entry all together…
This is awesome, it reminds me that what I’m trying to accomplish – or more importantly the method I’m trying to accomplish my goals in life with is right. It’s in the little things. Checking off a box in a member registration form for a free forum after actually READING the text about whether or not you’d like to receive X, Y, or Z notification. Caring and spending time considering what someone is saying because it’s clear they are are real, genuine, and offering something of value or interest with no strings attached. It’s about creating a relationship such that people are truly, genuinely interested in what you have to say, what your about, and eventually – in good time – what your selling.
Your selling yourself everyday – get used to it, everyday is another opportunity to generate leads that will eventually become prospects that will one day buy… YOU! The specific product/service is of little importance, it’s all about building relationships. I think in that way the prevailing forces at play today are forcing marketers and business people everywhere to look at their marketing models differently – more like a good sales person ought to look at their portfolio of prospects. “How can I develop my relationship with current customers and prospects?” “How can I make meaningful contributions to their lives/business such that they will in turn trust me more?”
I read “Never Eat Alone” last month and a line comes to mind… “Wealth, Health, and Children,” can’t remember who the author was talking to when he got this response but it left a mark in my mind. If your looking to build a lasting relationship with someone – these are the spaces you need to offer value. Help them build their business, help them be successful, help them take care of themselves and their body, help them out in some way with their little ones. These are the gestures and favors that leave an impression – they build a strong foundation and foster an environment of natural goodwill towards one another.
Once you have a relationship based on mutual interest – fueled by a never ending, unassuming stream of meaningful value additions going both ways you don’t have to sell them anything. It’s prequalification – your in, your good, if you say its the way to go and he doesn’t know any better he’ll take your word for it. The money’s on the table before you’ve even finished your sentence. I want to take it a step further – when the relationship is there and the pieces line up I take it upon myself to assume the position of the prospect and close. For instance I’ll be upfront and frank and say something like “just give me the money – you know it’s the right way to go,” or if an objection gingerly arises I’ll roll my eyes and assert my position even more passionately.
I’ve found that many times these objections are simply a habit born out of being screwed over time and time again – such that when the right situation arises with the right person and everything lines up they habitually hesitate. My perspective on how to handle this when you know your relationship is solid is pretty much to slap them in the face with it. I look at it as them standing in the way of themselves and their own success – that’s how I motivate myself to take such action. “Just sign the damn paper”… which translates into something like “you trust me, we both know this fits, I’ll take care of you if their are any problems, I know you know I care a lot about you and your business and would go out of my way to keep you happy because I know you’d do the same for me” sort of .
My future, my success will be born of community, customization, conversation and co-creation – Thank you “80 Minute MBA” – it’s the future of marketing as far as I’m concerned. I love it, I think I’m built for it, I love people – making things happen – putting the pieces together – adding unconditionally to my fellow human beings success – and being appreciated for what I do. I will rise or fall through my relationships as any good S/M professional ought to.
February 18th, 2010
This is the first of a new line of entries that will be categorized under free association, If your seeking fluency of thought and coherent arguments you may do better to venture elsewhere fellow netizen! Happy reading
Text wrestling – I always kind of liked the idea. Sitting down and fighting with the thoughts in your head – trying to get the same message conveyed with the words you choose. Perhaps that’s impossible, no two people think alike and as accommodating as one can be there will always be a degree of variance in understanding. I suppose it’s no mystery therefore that good listening skills and real understanding aren’t as easy to come by as we all would like them to be – and in turn why it’s so valuable when we find them.
Free association was my first introduction to the concept of free writing. I guess that made sense in that your thoughts were allowed to freely intertwine and the resulting garble was regurgitated onto paper.. or, more likely nowadays – a digital document. Then again it also may inspire an artificial degree of extravagant association whereas I prefer to write simply as my mind moves – not to push it to move and associate in odd ways for the sake of novelty. Maybe that’s just me.
I’ve been really cold the last 3 days, I’m not sure why but I’m beginning to believe my haircut has something to do with it. I cut it as I normally do – short – but perhaps I should have taken the unseasonably cold weather into account when choosing the time to cut. Anyway I managed to get back into my office today where I had stashed my beanie and gloves after I returned from the states. I was relatively certain at the time that both A. I was never going to use them in China and B. I was a numskull for bringing them all the way over here. The powers at be however seem to have a different opinion on the matter. I guess I’ll have to add this to the list of small lessons I’ve learned about surviving here – I’ll file it next to… dammit I had something clever to say… lost it.
Hey that reminds me I’ve yet to write about the improvements with my “train of thought” problems I’ve been having in the last year or so. I reflected on my experiences in China the two years prior and my life overall and made a simple but important decision. I deserve to be happy. Of course its more complex than that in action however the fundamental principle is what’s important. I suppose it’s not so much that I’ve never made this decision before but rather life has shown me from various positions just how necessary this belief is and more importantly how wrong lives can go if we do not adhere to, and build upon, this confidence.
My decision is not a made in a vacuum but rather in context – I see it as a culmination of my experience – a necessary and undeniable conclusion about life and how to live it. It makes things at once clear and simple – which is nice in a world where most of the things around me are anything but.
I believe I still suffer from a degree of cognitive dissonance as I have for much of my life. A part of me desires a simple life, simple pleasures, normal achievements and levels of success, a wife I love beautifully, and children I cherish and treasure. Taking pride in the emotional success and development of those around me as I traverse a humble path at a comfortable pace. A part of me desires disgusting sums of money and power so that I may experience a world very different from the real one. A world defined by ourselves, each acquiring the same flaws as it’s creator. Master of your own fate with your strengths and deviser of your own demise through your failings. I imagine it would be an incredibly enlightening experience – If I don’t lose myself in it.
A part of me is unshakably confident and resolute about the rights and wrongs of life, as if there where no other way. He acknowledges his points of weakness as he is inexperienced but is particularly confident when it comes to managing relationships – more particularly personal relationships. Friendships, family relations, romantic partnerships, acquaintances, etc. To him the decisions that boggle those around him at times are so obvious he needn’t wait for them to finish explaining their conundrum before offering the solution.
As with most those relationships that are closest to me are the most troublesome to deal with properly and objectively – as one ought to. It is hard to harness the confidence found through loving oneself to do the hard and right things when it concerns those that are – very much – a part of you. I try though, and though I’m very rarely satisfied, I am proud of myself when I take a moments to look back at my triumphs in those small intimate arenas of my life.
